Post Trauma Pleasure
Erotic exploration of our sexual sub-conscious is a place some of us dare to go. Uncovering the desires we have underneath the surface that we keep hidden even sometimes from our partners. But what if these desires were accepted, agknowledged and space created to explore them in awareness?
This is a movement that is happening and a more conscious approach to sexuality and how we explore and indulge in our pleasure is having an awakening. This is a world where we are moving towards POST TRAUMA PLEASURE.
We are seeing coaching boom in the space of sex, love and relating, quenching the thirst for a generation to uncover habitual patterns and open to LOVE and sex in a ways that has perhaps not been seen since the sixties. Discussing sex clubs, female pleasure and the latest platform to explore Kinks and learn how to domme your partner seem much less taboo than it did ten years ago. This movement in essence is a collective shift from sub-conscious to conscious and allows us a place to bring our kinks into our awareness, to see and embody them without shame and to get to understand them as signposts of trauma imprints hat finds a way to move from disconnection to connection.
This is the beauty of the subconscious our desires that are thought of as wrong, bad or in misalignment with who the conscious mind thinks we are find a home within the shadows. We find love on our knees of the dungeon, our abandonment wounds salved by a collar, our fear of emeshment tamed by holding a whip, all of the wounding we experience that leave a somatic and emotional imprint within our being at a young age, leave this echoe of thrill within our biololgical, emotional and sexual systems.
The human hearts drive to be loved, moves through this subconscious filter and we can embody the behaviours that soothes our initial wounding. When we look at it with this awareness we become empowered, as we get to choose how, with who and when we interact with this primal expression of ourselves.
Rather than the Kink driving us, we can gain knowledge from this experience and knowing of our inner workings of both our inner child and our adult selves. Post trauma pleasure is choosing to move into these places within ourselves, with awareness, knowing we can use this place of sexual exploration to indulge in this known concave groove of our forbidden pleasure or push ourselves further into the convex expression.
What can we learn from the role and expression? What somatic and emotional stability can we create through moving beyond where our subconscious has kept us rooted. The body holds memory, and these memories and memory feelings will alwasy be there to meet us in the same places where we met them, until we choose to move beyond them. This is what I believe to be post trauma pleasure.
Where our sexual expression gets to heal us, it gets to take us beyond who we were shaped into being within the echo chambers of both mind and body. Our convex expression can deliver us the safety we receieve from another within the traditional framework of where we naturally sit in the power higherarchy,but this is still rooted in co-dependance. When we can allow ourselevs to inhabit a different role we can learn to give as well as receive.
This inversion can help both partners to explore new territory and deepen their relationship through trust, play and curiosity. This framework has the potential to move both people within the partnership forward and expand their relationship to their personal desire as well as that of their partners.
We get to access a full spectrum of being within the realm of our sexual expression, this is the integration of the full self.
Rather than the wounded self that drives us into a particular BDSM framework. We have the power to move beyond repetition into creation of new timeline of sexual expression. Sounds good right?!
This is pleasure as indulgence, but also as awareness and as a pathway to personal and collective evolution.
More thoughts are forming on this topic and I will keep you updated on my musings as they drop in.
Until then keep it Sensual.
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